Family

What common in family;
Saying something awful to the parents?
‘It’s not a big deal. They understand’
Doing something hurtful to our family member?
‘They will be fine. No worries’
Start a fight over something dumb?
‘No need to apologize. They will forgive us anyway’
This is where our mindset about family messes up big time I tell you.
We thought as a family member, we can do as we pleased and they will always accept us no matter what. But we completely forgot that they are still human beings. With feeling and emotion.
Being a ‘family’ doesn’t give us a free pass to treat them to our heart’s content. It only gives us a free ticket to love them unconditionally.

Sincerely me,
Az.Ra

You Doing Great

It’s hard isn’t it?
To live in a society that is always prejudiced and judgmental.
To always be conscious every two seconds of what they have in store for you when you make a mistake.
To take all the bad words that are being spat out from their mouth.
To see the hate in their eyes for you when they think you are doing something wrong.
As if they have a right to criticize and judge us for who we used to be.
As if they’ve perfect and haven’t done anything wrong in their life.
As if they’ve much better than anyone else.
It’s hard isn’t it?
I know. But keep going.
The reasons you exist in this world are not to please them or to meet their expectations. You are still breathing until now, not because of them. They don’t even have any significance in your life if you think about it. So keep going. Don’t give them a chance to make a choice for you. As long as you know who you are. Who you want to be. Or what you’re doing. I will say you have already achieved more than what they wish for.

Sincerely me,
Az.Ra

The Aftermath #LosingThem

Losing a parent or anyone you truly love is miserable.
I wish nobody would go through that heartache.
But we have to be realistic.
Sooner or later it is going to happen to everyone.
It’s gonna happen to you. And it’s gonna happen to me. Again.
When that time comes around, i hope you know this.,
The heartache. The pain. It will never stop.
What they said about ‘time heals everything’ ‘you going to be okay’ n stuff is one big fat lie.
No. Time doesn’t heal everything. Time just provides temporary distraction.
And no. You are not going to be okay. You’re just going to be strong.
Some days, yes. you’re going to be alright. You don’t feel pain as much .
That’s because you tend to forget about them since you just used to live your life without them.
So if you don’t remember them for a certain amount of time, don’t feel guilty. That’s just how you learn to cope with the pain. By forgetting. It doesn’t mean they’re vanished from your heart or your love for them has disappeared for good, because I can assure you it doesn’t. True love always stay.
Other times, you will remember everything and the pain becomes unbearable to handle.
Also stop being regretful because you feel like you are not accepting your fate and move on. It’s not true. It has nothing to do with accepting reality, and everything to do with feeling and emotion. Which is not in our control all the time.
Whatever it is, I hope you know that even if everything doesn’t feel perfect without them anymore, at the end of the day, you are still gonna be alright because happiness still exists even in imperfection.

Sincerely me,
Az.Ra

Tomorrow’s still an Option

Maybe now you’re hurt. But nobody says tomorrow you won’t heal.

Maybe now you’re scared. But nobody says tomorrow you can’t be brave.

Maybe now you’re sad. But nobody says tomorrow you won’t find your happiness.

Maybe now you’re struggling. But nobody says tomorrow it can’t become much easier.

Maybe now you’re alone. But nobody says tomorrow someone won’t appear in your life.

And maybe now what you really need to do is believe that everything will be alright when the time is right.

After all, everything will be alright in the end. And if everything’s not alright, it’s not the end.

Sincerely me,
Az.Ra

Can’t be Replaced

I already used to live my life without you in it that I never think you’re gone.
For some reason my mind keeps thinking that you’re not here only at this moment. Not ‘forever’.
I messed up, didn’t I?
For foolishly thinking someday I will see you again.
Saying our last words for each other and stuff.
I probably am.
Sometimes I keep questioning myself.
Did I think like that to hide the pain of losing you or to hide the fact that I can’t accept my reality?
Maybe both?
Either way I don’t think my train of thought will change anytime soon.
Because as much as I wish I can let you go. I don’t think I can. Ever.
After all I only got ONE Father in my lifetime.
And no man can top my love for you. That for sure.

Sincerely me,
Az.Ra

Perfect?

We are all too caught up with the idea of perfection that we can’t see anything beyond that.

Everyone always says nothing is perfect.
We are quite aware of that.
But we all know deep down we still wish for that perfection.

Secretly, we all dream of having a perfect life.
We search for the perfect partner to get married with.
When we have our partner, we hope to have a perfect wedding.
And then we wait for perfect timing to do that.
Just like that the list goes on with everything our whole life.

It consumes us and when everything starts crashing down and doesn’t go ‘perfectly’ as we plan, we keep thinking that life sucks big time. When really it’s just you that decided to make it seem like it.

All this mindset about perfection shouldn’t exist at all. Everyone should know there is no such thing as perfect. The word itself doesn’t sound right.
Why not just replace it with the word right instead?

For example, instead of saying ‘I have a perfect wife’, why don’t you say ‘I have the right wife’.
It is much more meaningful when you put it that way.

Even if it is not ‘Perfect ‘, it is still ‘Right’. See what I am trying to say? Much better don’t you think?

Now I leave it to you to decide.

Sincerely me,
Az.Ra

Poison Assumption

They were scared of expectation so they shut you down, but you thought they were running to get away from you.

They want their peacefulness by being alone someday, but you thought they were trying to ignore you.

They never express their feelings to begin with, but you thought they probably don’t feel anything.

They worried about moving forward in the bigger world, but you thought they were just being comfortable stuck in the present.

They lost their words in the moments, but you thought they didn’t have anything worth saying.

They got awkward sometimes, but you thought they were getting uncomfortable around you.

They act differently according to the person they are with, but you thought they were pretending to be someone else.

What you never really thought is what you see, hear and think sometimes not what is really happening at all.

Assume Nothing
Because it will make you blind from seeing the truth.

Sincerely me,
Az.Ra

Never Wrong to Feel

Some day you start your morning feeling great but end it pretty badly.

Some day you start by being so happy but going to sleep feeling sad.

Some day you wake up feeling motivated to finish your work, but later turn to bed with unfinished work still.

Some day during your morning you feel grateful with how everything in your life turned out, but going to sleep questioning what you did wrong when things start to fall apart.

And somehow it is never wrong to feel all these emotions because you’re human.

Your feeling is worthy of your attention even if it is not so positive.
Never doubt that.

Just don’t drown in it for too long

Sincerely me,
Az.Ra

Never an Option

Do you ever feel stressed and confused about making a decision in your life?

You just sitting there,
in front of computer
feeling lost if you want to pursue study in business or law.

Or maybe,

You just staring there,
in the dark
when the world is sleeping
Undecided whether you should keep fighting or call it quits already.

With everything in your life. Really.

If so, you really should know this.

If you have no idea what your true choice is between the two options that you have, make sure to always choose the second one. After all, if you really want your first option, the second will never be an option.

Deep down,
Heart knows what the heart wants. Even if the brain is always arguing.

Sincerely me,
Az.Ra

What Goes Around Comes Around

We keep wondering how they can smile so big, we don’t seem to realize that was their way to hold themselves together from crying in tears.

We keep wondering how they’re so confident in front of others, we don’t realize that they also hide their shaking hand behind their back when nobody sees.

We keep wondering how they can have so many friends in their life, we don’t seem to realize that only a few were the real ones.

We keep wondering how they’re so successful in their career, we don’t realize that they also had to sacrifice their family time just to complete loads of work.

We just keep wondering so we forgot the fact that everything in life comes with prices. When you get some, you lose some.

You might miss the brightness of the sun during the rain, but you got to see the colourful rainbows after that instead.
Just because you don’t get what you wish doesn’t mean you won’t get what you meant to have.

Sincerely me,
Az.Ra