You think you’re confident enough. However when time comes and you have to facing your audience, you’re shaking.
You think you’re brave enough to face any challenges. But when what you fear the most come knocking, you start to hide away.
You think you’re patient enough to keep waiting. However when one by one people passing by, you start questioning why it took so long.
You think you’re happy enough with all of your achievement. But when you see others become more successful, you create another goal to achieve.
You think you’re intelligent enough to solve any problem. However when some issues arises for you to handle, you’re can’t find any solution to fix it.
You know what?you over think!!
So what you say if you just stop for a second and just live in the moment. Go with the flow and have faith that life will turn out the way it supposed to be. Not the way you want it to be.
Let life do their magic. Nothing can go wrong with it in the hand of fate.
It take us losing someone
That make us realize the importance of loving dearly.
It take us giving up
That make us realize the importance of fighting back.
It take someone betrayal
That make us realize the importance of loyalty.
It take us hurting badly
That make us realize the importance of healing slowly.
It take us to experiences all of that bad thing
That make us start appreciate the goods even more.
Just because it’s bad. Doesn’t mean it useless.
So, stop hating or regret every bad thing that ever happen to you.
Only because they’re exist, that you can see the beauty of good thing.
So being thankful for everything even it was unpleasant to being though.
It a lesson. Not some unfairness to make your life miserable.
They ask how to move on,
He say doing this. She say doing that.
What I have to say?
Wanna know the reason as why you stuck in the past?
No. Not because of ‘it hurting too much’ bullsh*t.
And definitely not because of ‘ I’m too weak to face all of this right now’ nonsense either.
Neither are ‘ heeling take time’ concept that everyone seem to believe.
The reason you seems so oblivious of is you. Yourself.
Unknowingly, you blaming yourself right?
Wondering what you did wrong to subject yourself to such a heartbreak.
Or maybe even thinking that your imperfections is the cause of all the disaster that happen to you in your life.
Guess what honey? You completely wrong!! They ain’t.
Life happen. It’s completely out of anyone control. Change your plan as you might, if universe have another plan set for you, even if you don’t like that plan, it’s still gonna happen.
So how about start forgiving yourself. Forgive your imperfections. Forgive yourself for not being able to be who you dream yourself to be. Forgive yourself for not being able to achieve everyone expectations of you.
Let go all the self blaming. Let go of all the self doubt. Just let go. Whatever that holding you up from moving forward, let it go. And you might be surprised how good that make you feel.
What common in family;
Saying something awful to the parents?
‘ It’s not a big deal. They understand ‘
Doing something hurtful to our family member?
‘ They will be fine. No worries ‘
Start a fight over something dumb?
‘ No need to apologize. They will forgive us anyway ‘
This is where our mindset about family mess up big time I tell you.
We thought as a family member, we can do as we pleased and they will always accept us no matter what. But we completely forgot that they still a human being. With feeling and emotion.
Being a ‘family’ doesn’t give us free pass to treat them as our heart content. It only give us free ticket to love them unconditionally.
It hard isn’t it?
To live in society that always being prejudice and judgmental.
To always being conscious every two second of what they have in store for you when you make a mistakes.
To take all the bad words that being spat out from their mouth.
To saw the hate in their eyes for you when they think you doing something wrong.
As if they have a right to criticize and judging us for who we used to be.
As if they’ve perfect and haven’t done anything wrong in their life.
As if they’ve much more better than anyone else.
It’s hard isn’t it?
I know. But keep going.
The reasons you exist in this world not to pleased them or to meet their expectations. You still breathing until now not because of them. They doesn’t even have any significant in your life if you think about it. So keep going. Don’t give them a chance to make a choice for you. As long as you know who you are. Who you want to be. Or what you’re doing. I will say you already achieved more than what they wish for.
Maybe now you’re hurt. But nobody say tomorrow you won’t heal.
Maybe now you’re scared. But nobody say tomorrow you can’t be brave.
Maybe now you’re sad. But nobody say tomorrow you won’t find your happiness.
Maybe now you’re struggling. But nobody say tomorrow it can’t become much more easier.
Maybe now you’re alone. But nobody say tomorrow someone won’t appear in your life.
And maybe now what you really need to do is believe that everything will be alright when the time is right.
After all everything will be alright in the end. And if everything is not alright, it’s not the end.
I already used living my life without you in it that I never think you’re gone.
For some reason my mind keep thinking that you’re not here only at ‘this moment’s. Not ‘forever’.
I mess up didn’t I?
For foolishly thinking someday I will see you again.
Saying our last words for each other and stuff.
I probably am.
Sometimes I keep questioning myself.
Did I thinking like that to hide the pain of losing you or to hide the fact that I can’t accept my reality.
Either way I don’t think my train of thought will change anytime soon.
Because as much as I wish I can let you go. I don’t think I can. Ever.
After all I only got ONE Father in my lifetime.
And no man can top my love for you. That for sure.
When you angry with your parent because they give you advice for your own good,
Somewhere in this world, someone that lose their parent wish they still have one.
When you complain because your parent forget to bought your favourite food,
Somewhere in this world, someone have to fasting all day because they doesn’t have food to eat at all.
When you think life don’t treat you fair just because you can’t get your dream car to show off unlike your friends,
Somewhere in this world, someone have to walking miles in the heat just to buy groceries.
And maybe when you stop counting what you don’t have and start appreciate what you already got, you will see how lucky you already are.
Sometimes stop trying is not a bad things.
It good sometime to stop trying to care when they don’t even took their time long enough to appreciate it.
It also good to stop trying to make effort to spare their feeling when they don’t even spare a second to apologize for hurting you.
It also a good thing to stop trying to force a conversation that you clearly know one side when we all know relationship involved both sides to make it work.
N sometime it good to just stop trying for others and start trying for ourselves.
They say you learn from your mistakes. That true.
But they also forget to say that you only learn anything from your mistakes if only you acknowledge them.
So I say don’t feel ashamed to admit your mistakes.
Don’t try to lie to cover it up from others.
Don’t try to sugarcoat others with million reason as why you make them.
Don’t try so hard to forget and buried them in the back of your mind.
Just remember them. Embrace them. Only then you can start learning not to repeat it again.